True Confessions

I fully admit that I met my current GF via a matchmaking site online. What has been strange over the past couple of years is that as we have compared dates and times of place we have been...well, we have been at many of the same Gay Pride marches, AIDS events and concerts (ya know...like the Indigo Girls or Melissa) on the exact same day and time.
When talking with current GF I remember being in D.C. with an ex-GF many years ago and how she knew my now current GF and stopped to talk with her. I stood nearby, annoyed, and thinking hurry up, let's get going.
The only reason that I bring this up is because I am amazed at something about the online dating world.
I had a few accounts with different sites offering matchmaking services. I have managed over the last year and a half or so to get removed from the e-mail lists of most of them.
Once in awhile though an email will pop up to show me my "new" matches.
Things that I have learned:
There is a hard core group of people who are always on the site. I have seen their picture and profile on one or the other or many different sites over the past three years.
SUGGESTION: If you have had your picture posted non-stop for that length of time it makes me wonder if you are the "lemon" of possible lesbian relationships. It also makes me wonder if your breath stanks or if you are really socially inappropriate because if you have not managed to find someone after 3+ years there might be issues. Perhaps it is time to consider some professional help.
You might want to take the picture down for awhile and make potential daters out there stop wondering what the hell?
Additionally, if you have your picture posted for that length of time then anyone with half a brain might wonder if you are just looking for lots of sexual partners. Hey, I don't have an issue with that, but if that is the case then STOP advertising yourself as looking for a LTR.

In addition...if you have yourself posted at the same site with different screen names, but essentially the same age, picture, location, etc....that makes a potential dater pause and wonder if you really think someone is not smart enough to notice that your are, "luvsladies," "sexxieyes," and "694me."
Which brings me to another decent point...lay off of the lame names. The woman who lists herself as "slowscrew4me." Ummm..........eeeeewwwww, yuk.
Might just as well call yourself "'ho that's slow to "O." If you can appreciate my lingo on that one.

I also have a sneaking suspicion that eventually the dating service will just cycle every other potential dater through a person's e-mail account as a "Look who we have matched you up with person." Bless their hearts for thinking that I will date a neo-Conservative Christian lesbian who loves deer hunting, guns and Sarah Palin, but really, not so much.....

I am lucky to have found a nice, smart, decently employed woman who is stable. (On most days;) But hey, she would likely say the same about me....

Job Hate

People are so kind that they keep telling me positive things about my new job.

"Give it time."
"You'll get used to it."
"Change is hard."

Okay, nice things to say, but meanwhile I'm miserable.
To top things off for the first time since becoming a hopsital nurse I hurt my back at work.

Typically I don't pay a lot of attention to my paycheck, but I did notice where I was charged 1.5 hours of Personal Time Off (PTO) on the paycheck when I went to the ED to have my back checked out.
What kind of place charges you your personal/sick/vacation time to go to the ER for an injury that occured at the work place?
Apparently the place where I work.

So I questioned it, and got the answer that yes, I do have to use my PTO to be seen in the ER in the middle of my shift no less.
I find the contract on-line and a paragraph where it clearly states that an injured employee will continue to be paid, including any shift premiums if applicable, while they are gone due to an injury that occured at work.
If the employee is stuck in the ED past the end of their shift then the pay ceases, but hey, I'm Okay with that.

So I cut and paste that portion of the contract and email it to the Admin Assistants and both my Supervisor and Director. Suddenly no one is answering that email.
Makes me wonder how many people out there they have charged PTO for going to the ED and whooops, maybe that wasn't the correct thing to do.

Suddenly I'm feeling bitchy about the whole issue. I remember when I was working at a job in the mid-90s where I injured my back. As I recall they started paying my mileage to drive to and from my PT appts.
Suddenly I feel the urge to look into whether that applies in this case as well.
I don't get really angry very easy, but when I do...look the fuck out.
If I'm miserable I think the people who are causing the misery might as well pick up the clue phone and figure out that they pissed me off big time.

But hey, maybe that is just me.....

today

My sister's Birthday and three days past one year since my brother killed himself.

My grief clock has ticked over for him.

I added some songs to my ITunes today.
Looking back I see that some songs had been played an inordinate number of times when compared to others.

I listened to "Don't Worry Baby" by the Beach Boys nearly 300 times. When I was a young girl the Beach Boys always used to play a concert at the local outdoor venue on Memorial Day Weekend. My brother often went to see them when he was in High School.

The other song I listened to a lot was "Sara" by Fleetwood Mac. The poet in my heart, never die...

Happy Birthday to my sister. I love you like crazy.

Winter Hygiene

Talking about shaving the pits and the legs here.

In winter my skin is usually so dry that there is a bit of a hiatus in the shaving department.
That is usually no big deal in my world. I will be going to Florida shortly and might do some light maintenance then, but otherwise don't really care.

I got a surprise recently though.
In a few different arenas of my life.

I injured my back at work this past December.
I have been to the Occupational Health Services a few times. They gave me a lifting restiction that is essentially impossible to follow and do my work. The HCP (Health Care Provider...to cover MDs, DOs, PAs and NPs) tells me that it is up to my department to make sure that the lifting restriction is doable. Personally, I don't think my department gives a shit as they are chronically short staffed.

So...I digress. To get to the point here...I finally agree to go to some Physical Therapy (hereafter known as PT) aka...Pain and Torture (PT).

So I wander into my first PT appt carefree other than nervous and wondering about how much pain and torture I am about to be sujected to.
PT gives me a gown and tells me everything off except for my socks, underwear and bra. I resist the temptation to tell her that I have never had a woman come on to me so strongly....but I do amuse myself.
I then consider my rather jungly areas and that I am not wearing a pair of underpants that do the best job of covering all of my bits and parts. (TMI...I know).

During a post-appt review I realize that the legs don't look as bad as my over active mind had imagined. I was thinking King Kong, but it was more like hairless Chihuahua.

My pits were middlin'. The PT is originally from Europe so I assauge my qualms by thinking that I have always heard that in Europe women aren't nearly so uptight about the pit hair. Overall, I am sure she has seen more interesting things on bodies during her career so today I go back for my next appt.
Think that I might go perform a little pit maintenance now.

The other surprises an astute reader might be wondering about?
My left leg is a half inch longer than my right and I have scoliosis.
I'm a flippin' mess, but you already knew that didn't you?

Quiet Beauty

That is snow.

When it is dark out and only street lights provide some glow,
It is a quiet beauty that falls
From the sky it is wonderful as long as I have nowhere to go

sNOw, sNOw

It snowed for hours this morning.

I was in my house thinking that I wish someone would come along and offer to shovel the sidewalk to make some money.


I finally pepped myself up enough to get out there and just do it.

I looked out the window and someone had already done it and no one asked for any money.

Need to go out there and pay this forward somehow.